An English Lesson - Part 1

I have a friend about whom I will be writing one day soon. He has shown me that God can take a very long period of time to teach people lessons about Himself, His Word and His will. I have watched my friend over the years as he works his way through God's dealing with him on an issue until, perhaps 12 or 18 months later, after more or less continual interaction and dialogue with God he finally assimilates the lesson completely. It's like watching a cow chew the cud - but infinitely slower.

This is so contrary to my own mindset that I never cease to be amazed. I am at heart much more like the instant-experiential-satisfaction sort of Christian that is so characteristic of Christianity these days. I inwardly expect that all things have answers that can be had simply for the wanting of them - and that such an answer can be had now - while It's on my mind, or while I am in the mood or...well, you get the picture. I talk a big game about the sovereignty of God, but often demonstrate a mindset that's about the true centre of my universe, which is me. I am a walking, talking illustration of Rick Warren's book, the "Purpose Driven Life". My prologue opens up by saying, "It's not about me - it's all about God," but what follows betrays the fact that it's really all about me, and that all of the "meaningful" answers can be had within a short period, such as 40 days; only my own mind expects answers in 40 seconds.

But God is a far greater and much less predictable deity than I would have Him to be. He is wonderful. He is gracious. He is gentle. He is kind. He cannot be put into a box of my making and will go to great lengths to stop me, or to correct me, from going down such a road.

So here I am - having visited England and having seen my family for the first time in 12 years. I went over with certain aspirations and expectations - having prayed and contemplated what God's purpose was in it all for me. Of course the salvation of my relatives was on my mind. Of course I wanted to share the gospel with them. But I had learned enough to look for God to provide the opportunities. For the most part, He didn't. He was content for me to do the normal things that I had never had the opportunity to do with my family before. Dinner at my brother's house a couple of times. Hopping around town on the buses and trains with my father as he kept up his torrid routine of visiting my mom and shopping, and then home to do the cleaning, cooking and so on. He's 85 years old and he made me tired.

But there was no single moment of denoument where somebody said to me, "So tell me all about Jesus Christ." It is absolutlely fatuous of me to have though they would. But it was absolutely Biblical to have been ready for it if they did. Underlying all of this is the principle that God can turn somebody to His Son on a dime - or He can do so over an entire lifetime. Often we impatient types, when we see the outward evidence of somebody coming to Christ, are blind to the many, many things that God has woven into that person's experience to bring them to that point. All things so introduced were introdudced through means - such as a word read or heard, a life lived in front of them, a deed of kindness, a moment of poignancy, a period of frustration or despair. We don't know. And unless God shows us we can't know. And what's more, God must, by His Spirit, regenerate the human heart before a person can believe. Yet no matter how many times God tells me from His Word that He is in charge, my old nature usurps this incontrovertable fact and automatically wants to manipulate, control and to fully understand what God is doing right here and now.

So, once more let me give assent with my intellect to the theological truth that God saves whom He wills, when He wills, how He wills - and hope and pray that such a truth works down a little deeper into my heart as well as my head. Let me surrender. Let me be still. Let me cease from striving with God - cease to be found trying to be God. I know there is great joy to be found in that place, but my own corrupt nature rails against the truth. And the joy itself is not the objective so much as it is the fruit of God being seen for Who He is; of Him being worshiped in Spirit and in Truth. All of my lip service about His sovereignty is worthless until I reach the place where He is sovereign to me - where I actually think and live as though He is Lord. Talk is cheap. Truth imparted to the soul through grace and faith is priceless. This is what my friend understands. It is what he lives.